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Tuesday, March 20, 2007

America's Most Sacred Mystery Food

Their is a lot of history behind this phenomenon we refer to as the 'hot dog'. Hot dog historians argue the roots of the peculiar name. Most people have no idea what's in a hot dog. However we all agree that we don't care about the history, the name or the ingredients. We just know that we like hot dogs. So here are a few guidelines for you when you are at your next cookout! And remember only beer, no wine when your consuming America's sacred food!

Dos and Don'ts: Everyday guidance for eating America's sacred food

Don't...
put hot dog toppings between the hot dog and the bun. Always "dress the dog," not the bun.

Condiments should be applied in the following order: wet condiments like mustard and chili are applied first, followed by chunky condiments like relish, onions and sauerkraut, followed by shredded cheese, followed by spices, like celery salt or pepper.

Do...
serve sesame seed, poppy seed and plain buns with hot dogs. Sun-dried tomato buns or basil buns are considered gauche with franks.

Don't...
use a cloth napkin to wipe your mouth when eating a hot dog. Paper is always preferable.

Do...
eat hot dogs on buns with your hands. Utensils should not touch hot dogs on buns.

Do...
use paper plates to serve hot dogs. Every day dishes are acceptable; china is a no-no.

Don't...
take more than five bites to finish a hot dog. For foot-long wiener, seven bites are acceptable.

Don't...
leave bits of bun on your plate. Eat it all.

Don't...
Fresh herbs on the same plate with hot dogs over-do the presentation

Don't...
use ketchup on your hot dog after the age of 18.

Mustard, relish, onions, cheese and chili are acceptable.

Do...
Condiments remaining on the fingers after eating a hot dog should be licked away, not washed.

Do...
use multi-colored toothpicks to serve cocktail wieners. Cocktail forks are in poor taste.

Don't...
send a thank you note following a hot dog barbecue. It would not be in keeping with the unpretentious nature of hot dogs.

Don't...
bring wine to a hot dog barbecue. Beer, soda, lemonade and iced tea are preferable.

Don't...
ever think there is a wrong time to serve hot dogs.

Don't...

Spout out commands to your hot dog! They will not obey you, unless of course you just order them to taste good! (Ok I actually added that one)

Don't...

compare hot dogs to hamburgers. It's like comparing apples to oranges!

Taken from The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council

6 comments:

Simon said...

Holy mechanically separated meat Batman!

Mr. Hot Dog, I do still have one question regarding these dos and don'ts - Is it of proper etiquette to dip your hot dog/sausage in ranch dressing?

Jeff said...

I find several of these guidelines objectionable. Mustard is teh yuck, it's ketchup all the way. And yes I'm well over 18.

Simon said...

Well, these are proper etiquette according to the National Hot Dog and Sausage Council.....maybe your food palette has not matured yet. hehe

Anonymous said...

Or maybe the National Hot Dog and Sausage Council are a bunch of ignorant stoneage throwbacks.

Simon said...

...and then you got that

I still want an answer to my question maybe I will contact the Council and see what they have to say.

Simon said...

I want more too! We need the history of the Hot Dog!